What Is It Like Dating a Doctor?

Dating with a doctor.

Things to know before dating a doctor. So, you meet a doctor, you like each other, and you decide to go on a date. That’s great, right? You might even feel like you’ve hit the jackpot! Well, before you start jumping for joy, there are some things you should know about being in a relationship with a doctor. Like anyone else with a high-demand profession, there are some ups and downs when it comes to dating them.

In this article, you’ll learn what it’s like to date a doctor, male or female. However, these will be generalizations, because as you know, no two people are alike. There are hundreds of medical specialties and subspecialties. Not to mention, every personality is different.

What to Expect if You Decide to Date a Doctor

The purpose of this article isn’t to help you snag a doctor. It’s to help you know what you're getting yourself into—the good, the bad, the beautiful, and the ugly. Doctors have complex lives and sometimes deal with situations others cannot imagine. Let’s delve in!

1. Doctors are compassionate

Usually, someone becomes a doctor because they care about helping people. In medical school, they learn to be good listeners and communicators because that’s what it takes to be a good doctor. They realize that their patients care less about how many papers they’ve published and more about their compassion. It’s that empathy that also makes them great to be in a relationship with.

The busy doctor looks at his watch.

2. Doctors are busy bees

While some physicians work fairly normal hours, most work crazy long shifts — usually between 40 and 60 hours or more. If that’s not something you’re into, try to avoid doctors and specialists in these 10 fields:

  • Urology;
  • Neurological surgery;
  • Obstetrics and gynecology;
  • General surgery;
  • Medical oncology;
  • Pulmonary diseases;
  • Thoracic surgery;
  • Neonatal and perinatal medicine;
  • Critical care internal medicine;
  • Vascular surgery.

Before going on that second or third date, you might want to ask what their schedule looks like before taking things any further.

3. Doctors are stressed

Not all the time, but if they’ve just worked a 60-hour shift, don’t expect them to arrive at dinner lively and cheerful. Saving people and seeing death first-hand on a weekly or even daily basis takes a toll on people’s mental state.

That’s not to say your boyfriend or girlfriend will come home stressed every day, but there will be worse days than others. Expect to be there for them and have some patience. They may appear strong and indestructible, but behind that facade, they’re just as human as you!

4. Doctors don’t have time to plan

If you aren’t someone that likes to plan dinners, trips, and activities, you probably should avoid dating a doctor. They don’t have time for all that because they’re busy working long hours and worrying about their patients.

That’s not to say they care about their job more than you. However, it will always come first. But just because you don’t like planning now doesn’t mean you won’t come to enjoy it. Maybe just give it some time.

Doctor chating with partner.

5. Doctors are exhausted

The physical part of their job certainly takes a toll, but it’s the emotional side that makes them so tired when they finally get home. Maybe you have the energy to hit the town and go out for a nice meal at a restaurant. But they might have been dreaming all day of a homecooked meal waiting for them when they get home.

Dating a doctor means you’re always paying attention and being aware of their schedule and feelings. And while you might be thinking that’s the same for all relationships, it’s much more extreme with doctors.

6. Doctors appreciate their free time

Between work and sleep, doctors don’t have much free time. But when they do, they take advantage of it. That means more weekend trips, date nights whenever possible, and time with family. In most cases, you won’t find a doctor that likes to lounge around the house. They’ll be ready to go and would love for you to tag along. In a way, every moment is sweeter with a doctor because they have to take advantage of those rare moments.

7. Doctors are in great shape

Some doctors don’t take care of themselves as much as they should. But for the most part, doctors take care of their bodies because they know the ins and outs of the body. Diet, sleep, nutrition—they know what it takes to live better and more healthily. They also understand that people judge them on their appearance. Wouldn’t you trust a doctor that takes care of themselves to take care of you?

The Bottom Line

Don’t expect everything to be sunshine and rainbows when dating a doctor. Like anything in life, you have to take the good with the bad. But there’s one thing for certain, you can do worse! They might be stressed, tired, and busy all the time, but they’re also compassionate people that like to be active and make those special moments together romantic. That doesn’t sound like such a bad thing!

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